Confidence Is a Beautiful Thing!

I can have this same debate over and over again with the same people and with different groups of people, but no matter the outcome, I know that everyone isn't attracted to the same type of person. What makes someone attractive to one person is totally different for the next person.

For me, what makes someone attractive is confidence. You can be "ugly" or should I say, unattractive to another female but if you are confident, NOT cocky, but confident then there is something appealing about a guy. In general, I think confidence goes a long way. Take Biggie for example. He was pulling a lot of pretty females, but to me, I didn't see what the attraction was. People said he was charismatic and had a way about him. I don't doubt it but because I never knew him, I would never know. The same can be said about Lil Wayne. He has always had a pretty female on his arm, but to some females, he looks crazy and not in a good way. But Lil Wayne carries himself in a confident way that makes him attractive to some females. And to be fair, Seal is classified as a "sex symbol" and he's married to Hedi, but again he is not 'attractive' to most females. But I'm sure he has confidence which probably made Hedi fall for him.

When you give off true confidence it shows. Some people act like they are confident and fall short and their true insecurities come out, but you can pick up on it in any given situation. When you walk into a room full of people and the majority of them stop for and look for more than 2 seconds then there is an air of confidence which makes people take notice. And most of the time, it's down right sexy as hell!

What is it that attracts you to the opposite sex (or same sex if you swing that way ;)

The Pool Is Shallow

Sometimes, when I'm out with friends, we people watch. We couldn't help but notice that a lot of the guys are 'different'. Some in a good way and others in a bad way.

I know that there are a lot of good guys out there who are available to date, but there are also some lames out there who perpetrate like they are part of the good guy crew when they really aren't. And then you have the guys who are married or in a relationship who try to act like they're single.

Then to add insult to injury, this whole new 'skinny' era has caught on like wild fire and it's NOT cute. I don't think they realize that you can't do everything you see from celebrities. Guys are walking around in jeans that are so tight that they look like leggings.

I think that there's more to just the outer shell of a guy, but there are guys who lack personality. They can't hold a conversation because all they are used to is texting or AIM. But does the shallow dating pool affect peoples judgement on their decision making regarding leaving a 'dead end relationship'?

I think it does, I think that it makes some females stay in a relationship longer than necessary because they know that trying to find someone they can relate to is like trying to find a pair of designer shoes at a sample sale in their size. It'll happen but it'll take a lot of patience and a lot of time.

Do you think that the dating pool nowadays make people tolerate their mediocre relationships because they feel like there's nothing better out there?

Rocky Road

The other day as I was talking to a guy associate of mine, I noticed that he had a wedding band on his ring finger. I don't know why, but I asked if he was really married and he replied yes. I asked him how long and he said about 12yrs which shocked me because the few times I've seen him, I never noticed a ring.

We talked for a few and I asked him if the married life was fun and he paused before answering me. He said that things were "okay" and that he's sticking it out for his daughter. He continued to talk about his situation but not going too deep into things. I said that everything will work out, just as long as it hasn't gotten to the point where he's sleeping on the sofa while she sleeps in the bed room. He paused again and said that is what their situation is like and he opts to sleep on the sofa. 

His reason for the issues is that she's selfish, doesn't appreciate him and doesn't compromise. I told him that there are two sides to every story and he agreed. Nonetheless, I felt bad for the guy, so I offered to make him a drink (we were at a bbq).  I could tell that he needed to take the edge off and just enjoy good company of the friends he was around and after I made his first drink he was less focused on the issues he had at home.

The most messed up thing about his situation is that he is a good guy, but because of the things that he going through with his wife, he's going to become a different man especially if things between him and his wife doesn't work out (which I said out loud). He looked at me and said dayum...you're right...b/c I don't trust her, so the next woman would have to work extra hard to gain my trust. 

The other messed up thing is that I think he took a liking to me because to him I was a "cool chick". It's amazing how someones shortcomings can make someone like you. He probably would have never feel that way if his home life wasn't rocky.

Jay-Z said it in his rhyme once. "He man's shortcomings is turning me into something". I think that phrase is very true. How about you?

Loyalty Replaces Love

The other day, I was riding in the car with a couple of friends. We started talking about random things as usual. One of my guy friends brought up a female that he used to deal with. She and I were cool so I asked about her and he said that she was doing fine and that she was in a good relationship.

Of course he threw in a BUT and said that she hits him up on Facebook and says that the next time he's in her city that she wants to hang out with him. He felt that she shouldn't want to see him because she has a boyfriend and she's in love. Of course I defended his statement by saying that maybe she misses the friendship (nothing more, nothing less).

I then said, besides, being in love doesn't have anything to do with it. If a female wants to do her, she will definitely do whatever she wants regardless if she has a boyfriend, fiance or a husband. It's more about loyalty. If anything, she is in loyalty with her boyfriend and won't get down like that even if he decided to call her when he's in her town.

The guys in the car got quiet as they let my words dance on their minds. Just for good measure I repeated it and said...if a female is deep in loyalty then she'll always be true to her guy. Loyalty is the new love.

Do you think loyalty supersedes love?

Sorry :)

My apologies for PCL being down for a few hrs and for not posting anything new. I have been a little busy, but I will definitely make sure I post something daily ;)